Wednesday, May 03, 2006 at 2:02 AM

I know I've been rambling on and on about how much I desire to resume the identity of a full-time student and ending my job etc. But......

I'm going to fight to stay on my job. A fight war with my mum... Hahaz... She's really insistent and firm on me concentrating full force on my studies when I go uni. None of the reasons I gave worked on her.

Can earn pocket money to cover at least transport and food etc.
- NO.

Mabel has yet to find a full time staff and she really needs people badly.
- NO, this kind of things cannot compromise! (And by this, I interpreted as, "it's their business. You are MY daughter.")

I'll just work 1 shift per week, only 5-6 hours.
- NO. NOT AT ALL.


I've yet to tell her the last thing.

I like the job, I want to stay on, and I think it helps me gain invaluable experience.
- NO. Love your books, not the job. Working is going to distract you! You can always gain experience when you go out to work next time.


Wow. I think I don't even have to take up Psychology to read my mum's mind man... At least I predicted exactly what she would say when I mentioned going to Genting and Hong Kong to her, on 2 separate occasions. (And speaking of Genting, it's been 1 month since I went! No updates on the details still... Sorry...)

Now, I wish I have the psychological knowledge to tackle my mum and psycho her into letting me stay on. Just 1 day per week won't kill! And I'm a big girl now, I have to assume responsibility and ownership for my own life and actions. I'm not a rebel, but I just wish that she would know, this kind of sheltering isn't going to do me any good. In fact, I know that since young she's been protective of me. Overly sometimes. I understand, but everyone needs to learn how and when to let go. Otherwise, you may be doing more harm than good for that person ultimately.

It is true that working is exhausting physically and mentally, as well as emotionally, but overall, I still find this job enjoyable. Although I admit I'm not really the material for customer service. But I have the attitude, so it makes up for the aptitude more or less. Without the right attitude, the right character, the right principles, things can go awry. Terribly. Which is also one of the reasons I want to stay on now. To protect my family business.

I don't wish to be too judgmental, but I need to be on my guard. Got to polish my eyes, prick my ears, exercise my brain, sharpen my tongue. I don't know how people think of my performance. I know I'm forgetful, even after being full time for 2 months already, I still can't get all the things right. But I'm getting the hang of it. I'm learning and my brain is acting. To actually realise that oneself is capable of making decisions (right ones of coz') and implementing useful procedures, that not only yields satisfaction but boosts self confidence. And it really triggered off my genuine concerns for the entire business, though I may overlook some things at times.

I will NOT allow any nonsense in the cafe. And people shouldn't be executing nonsense.

rhapsody in blue.