怖い
Monday, March 24, 2008 at 11:34 PM

It's week 10. OMG. TEN.

Panic rush again. Ok not quite. A bit only.

Abit scared.... This sem flew by very fast again. I think year 2 literally FLEW. To my (and everyone's) disadvantage, regrettably.

Ok I should build up momentum on revising. Things don't look too good again. And I hate the word "AGAIN", in this context.

But nvm, at least I know I'm trying, trying harder though not very hard still. Hope things will be better. Even if it doesn't, at least I know I've tried and I'll just try harder next time =)

Some things are scary, especially when coupled with my paranoid/pessimistic character. But I choose to face it. Coz' I know I have to, coz' I cannot simply be selfish and wilful. Sometimes I think of other people on the same planet as I am -- even though I don't know them -- and feel that it's wrong to give up on myself (in any sense) when there are millions of others struggling with all their might and blood on similar things that they can't lose. And I feel, I'm being too disrespecful to ji-san if I choose to brush some things aside and pretend it's ok when the possibility of it being not ok exists.

I think I owe alot of people an apology, esp Mabel and aunty Amy they all. But I'll be fine. Have some faith in me =) Coz', you all are the major reason why I'm living and counting my blessings.

我并不懦弱
只是有时有点脆弱

And I know I may be dumb to think this, but I just want everyone around me to be happy, and of coz', myself to be happy. Only then I can truly be happy, I suppose =)

rhapsody in blue.